Dad Jokes – The groan-gorthy classics that never get old!
Proof that humour doesn’t need to be clever — it just needs to make everyone roll their eyes so hard they can see yesterday.
Whether you like one-liners or can't get emough of those punny jokes, these are the ultimate dad-level dad jokes. Want something a bit cheekier? Sneak over to our dirty jokes (adults only), or check out the best knock knock jokes.
Brace Yourself – Below are the funniest dad dokes in Mzansi!
- What are two octopuses that look the same called? Itenticle
- Name the thing that has a head, foot, and four legs. A bed.
- Did you catch wind of the story about the astronaut who felt claustrophobic? He just needed some space.
- My friend wants to become an archaeologist. I am worried his life will be in ruins.
- Did you hear about of the shoe factory blaze? Sadly, it claimed countless soles.
- How do fish get high? Seaweed!
- What's Forrest Gump's password? 1forrest1"
- What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? Where's popcorn?
- I never liked facial hair, but it grew on me.
- What did the earthquake say afterward? “Sorry, it was my fault!”
- Why did the orange lose the race? It ran out of juice.
- What kind of music scares balloons? Pop music.
- I know lots of jokes about retired people, but apparently, none of them work.
- I will find the one who stole my copy of Microsoft Office. You have my Word.
- Have you heard about the Italian chef who just died? He pasta way!
- My doctor just told me that I am slowly going deaf. It was hard for me to hear that.
- What do you call someone with no nose and nobody? Nobody knows.
- Why don't eggs tell jokes? They might crack up!
- Why do skeletons never go treating or tricking? They have nobody to go with.
- What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
- Why did the picture go to jail? It got framed.
- When does a joke become a dad joke? It is when it finally becomes apparent.
- I went to buy some camouflage pants, but I couldn't find any.
- I was going to tell you a joke about time travel, but you didn't like it.
- What lies beneath the sea bottom and feels anxious? A nervous wreck.
- What did one plate whisper to the other plate? Dinner is on me.
- Stop looking for the perfect match. Use a lighter.
- People say that they pick their noses. I am born with mine.
- Have you ever wondered how birds learn to flying? Well, they simply wing it.
- What do we call an unpredictable camera? A loose Canon.
- Crabs are not into charity. They are shellfish.
- Never write with a broken pencil, It's pointless.
- What the least spoken language in the world. Sign language.
- What do you call a beehive that doesn't have an exit? Unbelievable.
- I ordered an egg and chicken from Amazon. Just to check which one comes first.
- What were Benjamin Franklin’s words upon discovering electricity? Absolute silence – he was utterly shocked.
- I was charged nine dollars extra at a hotel for the air conditioner. It was seriously uncool.
- Why do golfers carry an extra pair of socks while playing golf? In case they get a hole in one.
- Do you know what a computer loves to munch on? Computer chips of course!
- Why do some couples visit the gym? They want their relationship to work out.
- Ever wonder why fish seem so clever? Well, they swim in schools.
- What is the sound made by a witch’s car? It is broom-broom!
- How can you stop a bull’s charge? Simply cancel its credit card.
- Why did the banana seek medical advice? Because it wasn't peeling too well.
- Never trust stairs. They are always up to something.
- A lazy kangaroo is called a pouch potato.
- Trees look suspicious on sunny days as they seem shady.
- What will you call a guy with rubber toes? Roberto.
- Saturday and Sunday are the strongest days. The others are weekdays.
- If you have seen a robbery taking place at an Apple store, you will be an iwitness.
- It is wrong when people say that age is just a number. It is a word.
- What’s the title for a priest turned lawyer? A father-in-law.
- The wedding arrangements were amazing. The cake was also in tiers.
- Why did the tomato turn red? It caught a glimpse of salad dressing.
- Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
- What do you get if you cross a sheep and a porcupine? I don’t know. But it can knit its own sweaters.
- I saw a car being driven by a sheep wearing a swimsuit. It was a lamb bikini.
- Two blondes fell down a hole. One said. It's dark in here, isn't it? The other replied. I don't know. I can't see!
- I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered.
- Impasta is a fake noodle!
- I am all set to spread the rumor about butter.
- I accidentally swallowed some food coloring yesterday. I'm alright, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside!
- What did the cupcake say to the icing? I'm muffin without you!
- Seven out of six people agree that they are pathetic at fractions.
- When you excel, they spreadsheet about you.
- I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage. I lost my case.
- A pun walks into a bar and ten people die. Pun in, ten dead.
- If a medium can communicate with the dead, just think what a large could do!
- What kind of music do wind turbines like? They are big metal fans!
Still hungry for more laughs? Explore our full collection: dad jokes, knock knock jokes, Afrikaanse grappies, dirty jokes (for adults only!), and tons of clean jokes for kids. Lekke Laughs has something to make everyone groan or giggle!